[Jokes] Paddy & Murphy

[McKenna, Chris (RDSSW)]

Paddy and Murphy went to London. 
After walking in the city centre for few minutes, Paddy turns to Murphy with
a look of amazement on his face and says: "Murphy, will you have a look at
that shop over there. I thought that London was supposed to be expensive but
that shop is as cheap as chips, so it is."
Murphy says: "Paddy you're right so you are, will you have a look at that.
Suits £5, Shirts £2 and Trousers £2. I think that we should buy a job lot
and take them back to Ireland. We would make a tidy profit selling them in
Dublin so we would."
Paddy says in agreement: "Murphy that is as good an idea as you'll ever
have, but I'm pretty sure that you have to pay taxes and duty on things like
that. The shopkeeper will never let us have them if he thinks that we're
gonna export them and make our fortune, so he won't."
Murphy thinks and says: "Paddy, I've got idea! You can do the best English
accent out of the pair of us. You go in there and do the talking and I'll
just stand behind you and say nothing. He'll never guess we're Irish so he
won't."
"OK Murphy", agrees Paddy, "I'll do the talking, you just stand there and
look English. "So the two visitors to our illustrious capital city go into
the shop where Paddy is greeted politely by the owner. Paddy then proceeds
to do his best Phil Mitchell impression; "Awwwight Guvnor, I'll 'ave 20 of
yer Whistle 'n Flutes, 20 Dickie Dirts and 20 pairs of strides. And if yer
don't mind I'll be paying with the 380 Pictures of the Queen from my Sky
Rocket."
Upon hearing this request from Paddy, the owner smiles, takes a look at
Murphy as well then asks Paddy "You're Irish aren't you?" Quite bemused,
Paddy replies, "Oh be'Jesus. Mary mother of Christ, if that isn't my best
English accent. How in God's name did you know that we were Irish?" The
Owner replies ..... "cos this is a Dry Cleaners"
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Chris McKenna
chris.mckenna at defra.gsi.gov.uk
cmckenna at sucs.org

"The best thing about democracy, 
is that you can speak ill of it"
--Anonymous