[Jokes] FW: How To Photograph A Puppy

McKenna, Chris (RDSSW) chris.mckenna at defra.gsi.gov.uk
Wed Aug 25 12:23:12 BST 2004

-----Original Message-----
From: Rob Hood 
Subject: How To Photograph A Puppy

* Remove film from box and load camera
* Remove film box from puppy's mouth and throw in trash
* Remove puppy from trash and brush coffee grounds from muzzle
* Choose a suitable background for photo
* Mount camera on tripod and focus
* Find puppy and take dirty sock from mouth
* Place puppy in pre-focused spot and return to camera
* Forget about spot and crawl after puppy on knees
* Focus with one hand and fend off puppy with other hand
* Get tissue and clean nose print from lens
* Take flash cube from puppy's mouth and throw in trash
* Put cat outside and put peroxide on the scratch on puppy's nose
* Put magazines back on coffee table
* Try to get puppy's attention by squeaking toy over your head
* Replace your glasses and check camera for damage
* Jump up in time to grab puppy by scruff of neck and say, "No, outside! No,
* Call spouse to clean up mess
* Fix a drink
* Sit back in Lazy Boy with drink and resolve to teach puppy "sit" and
"stay" the first thing in the morning...

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