[Jokes] Gung HO! (fwd)

[Chris McKenna]

Subject: Letter From A Farm Kid....

 

LETTER FROM A FARM KID . . . NOW AT MARINE CORPS RECRUIT DEPOT
Dear Ma and Pa:  I am well. Hope you are too. Tell Brother Walt and 
Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a 
mile. Tell them to join up quick before maybe all of the jobs get 
filled up. I was a bit restless at first  'cuz you got to stay in 
bed till nearly 6 a.m. but I'm getting so I like to sleep in late.

Tell Walt and Elmer all you do afore breakfast is  smooth your bed 
and shine some things. No hogs to slop,  feed to pitch, mash to mix, 
wood to split,fire to lay.  Practically nothing. All the men got to 
shave but it is not so bad since they's got warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice,  cereal, eggs, 
bacon, and the like But it's kind of weak on reg'lar food like 
chops, potatoes,ham steak,fried eggplant and pie. But tell Walt and 
Elmer they can always sit by the city boys that live on just coffee. 
Their  food plus yours holds you till noon when you get fed  again. 

It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.We go on "route" 
marches, which the Platoon Sergeant says are long walks to harden 
us. If he thinks so, it ain't my place to tell him any different. A
"route march" is about the same as the mailbox to the house. But 
the  city guys get sore feet and we all have to ride back in trucks. 
The country is nice, but awful flat.

The Sergeant is like a schoolteacher. He nags some.The Capt.is like 
the school board. Majors and Colonels just ride around and frown. 
They don't bother you  none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting 
medals for shooting. I don't know why.  The bulls-eye is darned near 
as big as a chipmunk head and it don't move. It ain't shooting back 
at you neither, like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is 
lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your  own 
cartridges. They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat  training. You get 
to rassle with them city boys. I  have to be real careful though, 
they break real easy.
It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home.I'm about the best
rassler they got 'cept for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake. 
He joined up the same time as me. But I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds  
and he's 6'8" and weighs near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before all the other
fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter, Gail