[Jokes] FW: New Words for 2007 (fwd)
cmckenna at sucs.org
Thu Jan 25 19:27:30 GMT 2007
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Subject: FW: New Words for 2007
To all of you who work in offices and or like partying I give you
NEW WORDS FOR 2007
Waving your arms around and talking Bollocks.
Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a
project failed, and who was responsible.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and
The person in the office who sees everything as "Mine, Mine, Mine."
The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by
sucking up to the boss rather than working hard.
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get
screwed and die.
An office filled with cubicles.
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's
heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. (This also applies to
applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)
Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into
when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with
the kids or start a "home business".
Single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate.
A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.
The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it
to work again.
The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file.
Decisions that fall from the "adminisphere" are often profoundly
inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.
This is often affiliated with the dreaded "administrivia" i.e. needless
paperwork and processes.
Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not
Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located.
That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just
made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all')> > BEER COAT.> The
invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at>
The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze
cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live, how you
got here, and where you've come from.
Modern Slang for 'beers', e.g. "Couple of Britney's please"
A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who works
in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges displaying
stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level
The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from
the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing.
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: "Oo!Oo!Oo!
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the
toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people
so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.> >
The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake
up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in
your bed instead.
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got
An excellent phrase for an overweight person
Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women
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