[Jokes] FW: Saturday Jokey
McKenna, Chris (RDSSW)
IMCEAX400-c=GB+3Ba=ATTmail+3Bp=MAFF400+3Bo=MAFF+3Bs=McKenna+3Bg=Chris+3B at defra.gsi.gov.uk
Sat Dec 7 10:51:17 GMT 2002
From: John Colby [mailto:john at colby.evesham.net]
Sent: 06 December 2002 16:39
Subject: [TTFF] Friday Jokey
Don't mess with this lady
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As
a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, and he opened his
trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat she said, "Sir, I need
to see your ticket, not your stub."
Let's go for stupid
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but
couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do
these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No, ma'am, they're
Caught for speeding
The cop got out of his car and the kid, that was stopped for speeding,
rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.
The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could, sir." When the
cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
Stuck under a bridge
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads
"low bridge ahead." Before he knows it the bridge is right ahead of him and
he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a
police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks around to the
truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck,huh?" The
truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."
The man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and
walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a
policeman. "What are you doing out here at 2:00 A.M.?" asked the officer.
"I'm going to a lecture." The man said. "And who is going to give a lecture
at this hour?" the cop asked. "My wife," said the man.
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