[Jokes] FWD: TENNIS ELBOW (fwd)

[Steve Hill]

One day, Pete complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts, I think
> > > I'll go and see my Doctor!" His friend immediately replied, "Don't do
> > > that. There's a new computer at Boots (the Chemist) that can diagnose
> > > anything quicker and cheaper than your doctor. All you do is put in a
> > > sample of your p**s and the computer will diagnose your problem and
tell
> > > you what to do." Pete, figuring that he had nothing to lose, filled a
> > jar
> > > with his p**s, went to Boots where he found the computer and deposited
> > his
> > > sample and the computer started making a few noises  and some lights
> > > started to flash. After a brief pause, out popped a small piece of
paper
> > > which read:
> > > YOU HAVE TENNIS ELBOW, SOAK YOUR ARM IN WATER THREE  TIMES A DAY FOR
AN
> > > HOUR. AVOID HEAVY WORK. YOUR ELBOW WILL GET BETTER IN TWO WEEKS.
> > > That  evening while thinking about how amazing this new technology was
> > and
> > > how it could change the world of medicine forever, he began to wonder
if
> > > the computer could be fooled. He decided to try. He mixed together
some
> > > tap water, engine oil from his car, a stool sample from his dog, urine
> > > samples from his wife and daughter, and, at the last minute,
masturbated
> > > into the concoction. He went back to Boots, deposited the sample and
> > paid
> > > his  money. After the noises and lights, out popped a piece of paper
> > which
> > > read:
> > > YOUR TAP WATER IS HARD, GET A SOFTENER.
> > > THE VALVES ON YOUR ENGINE ARE  F**KED,GET IT TO A GARAGE. YOUR DOG HAS
> > > WORMS, GET HIM TO A VET. YOUR  DAUGHTER IS HOOKED ON COCAINE, GET HER
TO
> > > REHAB. YOUR WIFE IS PREGNANT WITH TWINS, THEY ARE NOT YOURS, GET A
> > LAWYER.
> > > AND IF YOU DON'T STOP  WANKING, YOUR ELBOW WILL NEVER GET BETTER.

-------------- next part --------------
One day, Pete complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts, I think
> > > I'll go and see my Doctor!" His friend immediately replied, "Don't do
> > > that. There's a new computer at Boots (the Chemist) that can diagnose
> > > anything quicker and cheaper than your doctor. All you do is put in a
> > > sample of your p**s and the computer will diagnose your problem and
tell
> > > you what to do." Pete, figuring that he had nothing to lose, filled a
> > jar
> > > with his p**s, went to Boots where he found the computer and deposited
> > his
> > > sample and the computer started making a few noises  and some lights
> > > started to flash. After a brief pause, out popped a small piece of
paper
> > > which read:
> > > YOU HAVE TENNIS ELBOW, SOAK YOUR ARM IN WATER THREE  TIMES A DAY FOR
AN
> > > HOUR. AVOID HEAVY WORK. YOUR ELBOW WILL GET BETTER IN TWO WEEKS.
> > > That  evening while thinking about how amazing this new technology was
> > and
> > > how it could change the world of medicine forever, he began to wonder
if
> > > the computer could be fooled. He decided to try. He mixed together
some
> > > tap water, engine oil from his car, a stool sample from his dog, urine
> > > samples from his wife and daughter, and, at the last minute,
masturbated
> > > into the concoction. He went back to Boots, deposited the sample and
> > paid
> > > his  money. After the noises and lights, out popped a piece of paper
> > which
> > > read:
> > > YOUR TAP WATER IS HARD, GET A SOFTENER.
> > > THE VALVES ON YOUR ENGINE ARE  F**KED,GET IT TO A GARAGE. YOUR DOG HAS
> > > WORMS, GET HIM TO A VET. YOUR  DAUGHTER IS HOOKED ON COCAINE, GET HER
TO
> > > REHAB. YOUR WIFE IS PREGNANT WITH TWINS, THEY ARE NOT YOURS, GET A
> > LAWYER.
> > > AND IF YOU DON'T STOP  WANKING, YOUR ELBOW WILL NEVER GET BETTER.





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