[Jokes] funnies for a monday morning

[Chris McKenna]

A collection of allegedly true stories from the US about kids...


I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a 
woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark 
naked & As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my five-year-old shout 
from the back seat, "Mom That lady isn't wearing a seat belt

My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd 
dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in 
the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my 
bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a 
charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, cause it 
fell in the toilet a few days ago

On the first day of school, a first grader handed his teacher a note from 
his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not 
necessarily those of his parents."

A woman was trying hard to get the catsup [ketchup] to come out of the jar 
During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year old daughter 
to answer the phone. "It's the minister, Mommy," the child said to her 
mother. Then she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you 
right now. She's hitting the bottle.

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker 
room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies 
grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement 
and then asked, "What's the matter haven't you ever seen a little boy 
before?"

POLICE # 1 While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary 
school, I was interrupted by a little girl about six years old Looking up 
and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?" "Yes, answered and 
continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help I 
should ask the police. Is that right?" "Yes, that's right," I told her. 
"Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you 
please tie my shoe?"

-- 
Chris 'Awkward' McKenna

cmckenna at sucs.org
www.sucs.org/~cmckenna


The essential things in life are seen not with the eyes,
but with the heart

Antoine de Saint Exupery