[Jokes] humble pie

[Chris McKenna]

>From a California paper:

"We apologize for referring to Sgt Brown as a member of the defective 
branch of the police force. He is, of course, a member of the detective 
branch of the police farce." 

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IMPORTANT NOTICE: If you are one of hundreds of parachuting enthusiasts 
who bought our Easy Sky Diving book, please make the following correction: 
on page 8, line 7, the words 'state zip code' should have read 'pull rip 
cord'.

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It was incorrectly reported last Friday that today is T-shirt Appreciation 
Day. In fact, it is actually Teacher Appreciation Day.

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>From a California bar association's newsletter : Correction - the 
following typo appeared in our last bulletin: 'Lunch will be gin at 12:15 
p.m'. Please correct to read '12 noon'. 

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The marriage of Miss Freda van Amburg and Willie Branton, which was 
announced in this paper a few weeks ago, was a mistake which we wish to 
correct.

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Yesterday we mistakenly reported that a talk was given by a bottle-scared 
hero. We apologize for the error. We obviously meant that the talk was 
given by a battle-scarred hero.

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Apology: I originally wrote, "Woodrow Wilson's wife grazed sheep on front 
lawn of the White House.' I'm sorry that typesetting inadvertently left 
out the word 'sheep'."


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The following is an ad from a real-life newspaper which appeared four days 
in a row -- the last three hopelessly trying to correct the first day's 
mistake.

MONDAY:

For sale: R.D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Phone 948-0707 after 
7 P.M. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap.

TUESDAY Notice:

We regret having erred in R.D. Jones' ad yesterday. It should have read, 
"One sewing machine for sale cheap. Phone 948-0707 and ask for Mrs. Kelly, 
who lives with him after 7 P.M."

WEDNESDAY Notice:

R.D. Jones has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone 
calls because of the error we made in the classified ad yesterday. The ad 
stands correct as follows: "For sale. R.D. Jones has one sewing machine 
for sale. Cheap. Phone 948-0707 after 7 P.M. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who 
loves with him."

THURSDAY Notice:

I, R.D. Jones, have no sewing machine for sale. I smashed it. Don't call 
948-0707 as I have had the phone disconnected. I have not been carrying on 
with Mrs. Kelly. Until yesterday she was my housekeeper but she quit!

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"In our magazine, The Editor, page 3, February 11, we referred to the Six 
nations rugby [union] tournament in which we said 'Wales thrashed France' 
- a possibly partisan way of interpreting the actual result: Wales 3, 
France 36."

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>From The Guardian, 2 Feb 1999:

"The absence of corrections yesterday was due to a technical hitch rather
than any sudden onset of accuracy."




-- 
Chris 'Awkward' McKenna

cmckenna at sucs.org
www.sucs.org/~cmckenna


The essential things in life are seen not with the eyes,
but with the heart

Antoine de Saint Exupery