[Jokes] School answering machine

Chris McKenna cmckenna at sucs.org
Tue Aug 2 10:30:49 BST 2005

---------- Forwarded message ----------
> Subject: School answering machine message
  More schools should have this on their answering machine !!
This is hilarious, no wonder some people were offended!)

This is the message that the Pacific PalisadesHigh School
(California) Staff voted unanimously to record on their school
telephone answering machine. This came about because they
implemented a policy requiring students and parents to be
responsible for their children's absences and missing homework.
The school and teachers are being sued by parents who want their
children's failing grades changed to passing grades even though
those children were absent 15-30 times during the semester and did
not complete enough school work to pass their classes.

This is the actual answering machine message for the school:

"Hello!You have reached the automated answering service of your
In order to assist you in connecting the right staff member,
please listen to all your options before making a selection:
To lie about why your child is absent -Press 1

To make excuses for why your child did not do his work- Press 2

To complain about what we do -Press 3

To swear at staff members -Press 4

To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in
your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you -Press 5

If you want us to raise your child -Press 6

If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone -Press 7

To request another teacher for the third time this year-Press 8

To complain about bus transportation -Press 9

To complain about school lunches -Press 0

If you realize this is the real world and your child must be
accountable and responsible for his/her own behavior, class
work, homework, and that it's not the teachers' fault for your
child's lack of effort:Please hang up and have a nice day!! (Thank

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