[Jokes] Ignorance truly is bliss (fwd)

[Chris McKenna]

---------- Forwarded message ----------

Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you  die.


This is just so priceless, and so easy to see happening,  customer service
being what it is today.


A relative died this past  January, and Citibank billed her for January and
February for their annual  service charges on her credit card, and then added
late fees and interest on the  monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00, now
it was somewhere around $60.00.


I placed a call to Citibank:


"I am calling to tell you  that she died in January."


Citibank: "The account was never closed  and the late fees and charges still
apply."


Me: "Maybe, you should  turn it over to collections."


Citibank: "Since it is 2 months past  due, it already has been."


Me: So, what will they do when they find  out she is dead?"


Citibank: "Either report her account to the frauds  division or report her to
the credit bureau, maybe both!"


Me: "Do  you think God will be mad at her?"


Citibank: "Excuse me?"


Me: "Did you just get what I was telling you--The part about her  being
dead?"


Citibank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor."

Supervisor gets on the phone:


Me: "I'm calling to  tell you, she died in January."


Citibank: "The account was never  closed and the late fees and charges still
apply."


Me: "You mean you  want to collect from her estate?"


Citibank: (Stammer). "Are you her  lawyer?"


Me: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given)


Citibank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"


Me:  "Sure." (Fax number is given)


After they get the fax:


Citibank: "Our system just isn't setup for death. I don't know what  more I
can do to help."


Me: "Well, if you figure it out, great! If  not, you could just keep billing
her. I don't think she will care."


Citibank: "Well, the late fees and charges do still apply."


Me: "Would you like her new billing address?"


Citibank:  "That might help."


Me: "Odessa Memorial Cemetery, Hwy 129, plot  number 6 9."


Citibank: "Sir, that's a cemetery!"


Me:  "What do you do with dead people on your planet?"