[Jokes] A fairy tale

[Justin Mitchell]

Police arrested Malcolm Davidson, a 27 year old white male, resident of
Wimbledon, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 pm Friday. Davidson will be charged
with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication
at the County courthouse on Monday.

The suspect allegedly stated that as he was passing a pumpkin patch, he
decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there
was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he
stated in a phone interview from the County courthouse jail. Davidson went
on to state that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a
pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a
hole in it and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need". "I guess I was just
really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment.

In the process, Davidson apparently failed to notice the Wimbledon Municipal
police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda
Taylor approached him. "It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said
officer Taylor. "I walked up to (Davidson) and he's...just working away at
this pumpkin." Taylor went on to describe
what happened when she approached Davidson.

"I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are
screwing a pumpkin?" He got real surprised as you'd expect and then looked
me straight in the face and said, 'A pumpkin? Damn... is it midnight
already?"